1. I had a customer call and just ask for an address to write to Cadillac. I said, "You want to write to Cadillac, at PO Box..." at which point I paused and already I was way ahead of him somehow. "Wait, wait, hold on, what was that again?" Look old man, if you're calling to ask me one simple cut-and-dry question, LISTEN when I give you the fucking answer. I can understand if you're asking something complex, or with lots of irrelevant numbers and letters, that you could get confused, but you're asking for a fucking address, and I hardly gave you any information to begin with and already you're lost?

2. So an alleged terrorist plot was foiled at Heathrow - I'm sure you've heard about it already - and now security is flipping out about liquids and other dangerous items like lip gloss and baby formula. Okay, so under the previous security regime you CAUGHT these terrorists, why then suddenly did security measures need to be altered to such an extreme? Obviously the previous security tactics were working perfectly because they prevented the situation. What's next - everyone has to strip naked and wear robes on the flight? Adam Settler takes power?